Exploratory Committee Findings on the Hunt Candidacy

We, the exploratory committee, find the potential of a Hunt candidacy to be low. We have examined his life, work, and writings. Although, citizen Hunt has many admirable qualities, his documentation, ideology, experience, and certain unsavory actions make a run for office nigh impossible.

Committee Findings on Documentation

Citizen Hunt does not have an official Ohio birth certificate. He has only produced a certificate of live birth. What is more disturbing is the fact that the certificate of live birth was filled out by his own mother. When the committee asked Hunt for proof of citizenship, he replied, “I gave you my certificate of live birth. What else do you want?”

When asked about his mother’s filling out of the certificate, Hunt replied, “My mom worked for the health department under Dr. Starr, the doctor who delivered me. She filled out the certificate, because it was her job. I hope you don’t have a problem with women in the workplace!”

The committee has found no proof that Hunt is from Canada or Mexico. Hunt claims to speak neither French nor Spanish; however, he took Spanish class in high school. Hunt’s lack of proof of United States Citizenship, and his knowledge of Spanish would raise the fears of the average citizen that Hunt is an undocumented worker.

Committee Findings on Ideology

Citizen Hunt holds to outdated political and social ideology. Hunt stubbornly insists that the committee is committing the fallacy of argumentum ad novitatem. Hunt said, “You are slaves to the present, unwilling to learn from the past. Present definitions of justice and rights neither agree with the past, nor agree with common everyday experience in the present.”

Hunt is religious, which in and of itself does not disqualify a candidate; however, his religious views concerning the Sabbath have met with a mixed audience. Seventh Day Adventists believe him to be a Sabbath-breaking heretic, but not a threat, since Hunt would never enact blue laws. Most Catholic and Protestant groups believe him to be a Sabbath breaking heretic. Hunt himself has defended his position claiming, “I keep the Sabbath by resting in Christ, not in any particular day, but everyday. I reserve Sunday for celebrating the rest given by Christ through His death and resurrection.”

The only redeeming factor in citizen Hunt’s religion is his stance on religious freedom. Hunt is against forcing his religion upon anyone by means of government legislation. Hunt has said, “Forced conversion may convert one’s actions and one’s identification in society, but it does not convert the conscience or soul. I prefer evangelism over proselytising.”

Committee Findings on Experience

Citizen Hunt has a dismal record on experience. He has no experience holding a political office. He has little experience in the business world. His experience as an hourly worker is exemplary; however, hourly workers do not make viable candidates. During the past twenty-two years, Hunt has lived under the poverty line. The committee does not think Hunt could raise the necessary funds for a successful candidacy.

Citizen Hunt has little experience in debate. Instead of answering our committees’ questions with short emotional appeals, Hunt either answered with long, drawn-out, in-depth answers, which no one on our committee could understand or follow; or Hunt would answer with a simple, “I don’t know. Give me a little bit of time to mull over the question, and I’ll get back to you in a few days with a long, drawn-out, in-depth answer.”

Committee Findings on Disqualifying Actions

When citizen Hunt has low blood sugar, he makes Rick Perry seem coherent. Hunt exhibits echolalia and often confuses words. When asked about this condition, Hunt replied, “Globle! The speaking of the mouth… in my mouth… the words I… I much speak… to be committed.”

We the committee were shocked when, during our initial fact-finding, we ran across embarrassing photographs on citizen Hunt’s Facebook page. The photographs speak for themselves. Hunt is not a viable candidate. Embarassing Photo 1

Going to the People

If citizen Hunt is to ever enter into a political race, he has to have grassroots support. The committee would like people to examine the candidate’s qualities. Anybody finding citizen Hunt a viable candidate should comment below stating for what office Hunt should run.


About haroyce

Royce is an aspiring writer of fantasy, history, philosophy, and theology. He earned his BS in History from Cedarville College, and his MDiv from Southern Baptist Theological Seminary.
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